I got off work early yesterday to get the kids from day camp. So we all arrived home an hour early.

When I get home, I like to just go lay in my bed and unwind for about 30 minutes. Since we got home a early…I thought I could have maybe an hour to do what I wanted, before we started dinner and I was going to help Sheldyn with her easy bake oven.

For some reason though, my kids cannot leave me alone when we first get home. Like they are both on the bed with Jeremy and I and bouncing and both tag team talking to me. Mom! Mom! Mom! Jeremy! Mom! Jeremy! Mom! I tell them constantly. “Hey, I just got off of work! I know you want to talk to me and hang out…but can I just relax for a little bit first. Please!!”   

I like to talk to Jeremy about the day, and sometimes I like to just lay there with my eyes closed for 30-45 minutes. I don’t know maybe that is really selfish of me? Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t. I don’t care to be honest. It’s what I like to do. Chase is definitely old enough to just go do his thing; Sheldyn can go play for under an hour with Barbie’s or color or just chill out on the couch or bed and watch some TV. Or do all of them.

So yesterday.

We are all on the bed. Kids tag-team talking. I then ask them if they can go play with their Christmas toys they just got! Go do something! I’m broker then broke from all those presents and you’d rather be in here. Go. I go out to the living room and get my laptop. I bought Chase these Nancy Drew games, and I’ve been playing one. I was looking forward to playing all day long. So I get my laptop, and Sheldyn is on my side with her fisher price camera she got for Christmas deleting pictures. I set my laptop down on the bed, open it up and start it. Then the sound of the deleting pictures was annoying me so, I told them to go play again. So rather then go towards the end of the bed (which is a water bed), Sheldyn STANDS up and starts walking directly towards my laptop monitor, like she was going towards Jeremy to show him a picture. She is all wobbly and I can see her falling on it and breaking it. So I think fast and slam my monitor shut, not realizing my mouse was on the keyboard, and it cracked it, and now half of my monitor is screwed up and has lines on it and just is fucked up and you can’t see shit.  

I was SO fucking mad. I cannot even tell you. I cried the rest of the night. Sheldyn went to her room and fell asleep and I didn’t even wake her up for dinner because I was so pissed at her.

I just got the laptop for my birthday. I don’t have another $500 to go buy another one.

Plus, I am so behind on things bills wise and I am so poor right now because of Christmas.

For Christmas, did I get one present? Not one single thing! Nothing. Everyone around me got stuff, and I got shit…and now my only source of entertainment…something I use every single day, is broken. A new screen is going to cost over $200. Ridiculous!  

I could cry right now thinking about it. To make matters worse is Jeremy trying to tell me…”We’ll get it fixed! It’ll be okay! You can see half the screen!”

Well at least you have a computer to go on. It’s really easy to say when it’s not YOUR computer. I can see half the screen and I’m supposed to be happy about that? Seeing half the screen makes me want to punch the other side or just throw the whole laptop against the wall. That isn’t a GOOD thing.   I might as well try to quit smoking right now too. Do you know how many times I reached for it last night??? About as many times as I would reach for a cigarette if I were to quit smoking. Or how many times, I thought I would go look up something on the Internet. Countless. Ridiculous.

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